I feel like I’ve just awakened from a cruel dream and discovered that Simon Cowell and Paula Abdul never left American Idol at all — and Jennifer Lopez and Mark Anthony are still together making beautiful music.
That’s because the new show The X Factor looks a lot like the old American Idol, with Simon and Paula ready to duke it out at the table along with LA Reid, a substitute Randy Jackson and Nicole Scherzinger, the lead singer of the Pussycat Dolls.
But the concept, according to show runners, is a lot different.
First of all, it isn’t a singing competition just for teenagers; anyone with a set of pipes can try to impress the judges, and groups can tag along as well. In addition, much like the singing competition The Voice, each judge will be assigned a group of singers to “mentor” in judges houses. The numbers will be wittled down for two live singing performances.
Still, it’s a variation on a theme, and another attempt by Brits to take back the colonies and rake in millions.
Everywhere you look on television today, there are Brits taking over the airwaves. There’s Simon, of course, Nigel Lithgoe over at the dreadful So You Think You Can Dance, Gordon Ramsay who occupies an entire night on Fox, with Masterchef, Hell’s Kitchen and Kitchen Nightmares.
Not to mention tabloid tattler Piers Morgan!
And Sharon Osbourne.
What the heck is happening to America?
Anyone who’s spent time in the UK knows that television programming is downright dreadful with the obvious exception of the cult hit, Coronation Street.
Most programming is either cheap reality or snooty dramas.
The BBC makes the CBC look good.
And yet Americans have embraced all things Brit, even the young Royals whose coverage takes up nearly half of the nightly entertainment magazine shows.
Definitely, it’s the second British Invasion.
And Canadians are paying the price.
That’s because Canadians were once the Grade A interlopers in Hollywood. We were damned good at it because we could pass without having to eighty-six the soppy accent. It used to be easy to get a job in Hollywood or New York if you were Canuck because both places were being run by Canadians — guys like Lorne Michaels and Ivan Reitman, Paul Haggis, Norman Jewison, Graham Yost — even second stringers like Allan Thicke and Al Hamel.
Now it seems some of the Canadians have migrated to Las Vegas. You can’t walk down the strip in Sin City without being sold tickets to Celine Dion, Shania Twain, Rich Little or Paul Anka.
The rest of the Canadian talent seems to have been left in the ghettos, relegated to Friday nights on CBS or to the absolutely awful HBO Canada.
I think this is an outrage.
This is a rallying cry. It’s time to take back the United States and turf out the Cowells and the Lithgoes.
Come on, now.
The quality of our television experience depends upon it.